180

In less than one week's time I went from being a full time stay at home Mom living in my parent's house, to having 2 jobs, becoming a college student, and ... living with my parents.  Two outta three ain't bad.  
I can't believe it's taken so long for me to jump back into life.  I know I sound repetitive, but my head is spinning a little bit, in a good way.  After hopping around town the other day with a bag full of resumes and just enough cleavage showing to impress the male restaurant owners, but not enough to offend the female owners, I easily landed two jobs.  One as a waitress, one as a bartender.  I don't know why I found the idea of doing that SO overwhelming until now.

Ok, that's not entirely true.  I do know why, to an extent..   It took me a good amount of time after leaving John to gather up all of my thoughts and emotions and put them in check.  I needed to organize all my thoughts and experiences into a mental file cabinet, where they were safe, and could be recalled when needed, but not so up front where they could continue to mess with my head.   That took some time.  Also, my kids are at a very different stage now, than they were when I left, almost 2 years ago.  R was and infant when I left, and J was just moving into the terrible 2's.  I just could not have left them with a daycare in the hands of strangers at that point.  Now, J is in preschool, headed for kindergarten, and R will be starting preschool in the fall too. 

As I was filling out MORE legal paperwork tonight, I was talking to my parents about all the changes that are happening right now.  I said to them (what I expressed above, here)  that I can't believe that it took me nearly two years to get to this point of getting jobs and back in school and whatnot ..  to this, my mother replied, "well, he stopped giving you your support checks.. not having money is a motivator.."  

My Dad said, "Jude, sometimes things take time, just because they take time."  and THAT is why I love my Dad.  My Mom was right, probably.  I got off my ass because I have to now.  But my Dad is also right... and he is also diplomatic and empathetic.... which is why I praise my Dad on this blog, and bitch about my Mom.  She's the realist, He's the emotional one... Yin and Yang.  I love them both very much. In very very different ways.

Anyway, it's coming around.....